msdeputyspeaker (msdeputyspeaker) wrote,
msdeputyspeaker
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Notes, 9 October 2012

Dawn Primarolo's Notes, 9 October 2012
(These notes are kept for the purpose of authentication if there is ever an investigation into the case of the parliamentary werewolf, Lord Peter Mandelson, and the conduct of his keeper, Speaker John Bercow. They are warded to be read only by the author and by those she chooses to disclose them to.)

I swear, I am the only sane person in this entire convoluted saga.

Let me recap. (1) There is a werewolf being kept in Westminster.

This is wrong. No werewolf should be kept in Westminster. It is a highly populated area that is also overrun with tourists. A werewolf who managed to break loose could do an incredible amount of damage in a very short period of time.

(2) This werewolf was, when human, a wizard of no small quality.

This is even more dangerous. Besides the danger of lycanthropy and blunt-force trauma, we now also have to deal with a magical werewolf. Has this been studied at length? Who knows what a magical werewolf will wish or be able to do. Extra caution is required.

3) However, this is an inherently time-limited situation, as the werewolf will shortly be either cured or dead.

This is a good thing, and the only reason that I am willing to cooperate. But it is not a good thing when it makes some of the principals in the case relax their guard under a misguided humanitarian impulse. The werewolf is not a human and should not be treated as one. The werewolf is an incredibly dangerous supernatural being who may be able to ape human customs, but is no longer one. Who knows what goes through its mind?

4) The werewolf's owner and his wife are choosing to allow the werewolf unfettered access to their children.

This is a shocking and beyond horrible thing. One moment of inattention - or one moment of the werewolf losing what little grasp on reality it has - and the children will be turned into werewolves themselves or mauled, likely to death. I continue to be absolutely appalled that parents would put their children in such danger. I believe that I have talked John into seeing reason, but Sally seems much more obdurate. If they continue this rash and irresponsible course, I will have no course left open to me but to report them to DEFRA.

5) Sally has accused me of being bigoted.

I do not believe I am. Bigotry is an irrational hatred. I do not hate the werewolf, I am simply well aware of the danger it poses to society. Neither am I irrational. To the contrary, my caution is completely rational. If the werewolf escapes due to John's soft heart and lax guarding, it could bite and maul dozens of people before it was caught. Those dozens could bite and maul hundreds in their turn, causing an epidemic in no time at all. This is why DEFRA controls the werewolf population so closely. Supernatural creatures that are not dangerous are only tracked and lightly controlled. It is the supernatural creatures that can cause immediate and significant damage to our world that DEFRA has to use stronger measures with.

Werewolves are not sweet and cuddly. They are not dogs. They are not friends. They are not humans. They are dangerous killers, and allowing them to range freely around children is a travesty beyond words.

I am not evil. I do not want the werewolf to be tortured. I do not even want the werewolf to be killed, although a true utilitarian would. If the cure potion succeeds, I will be pleased. But I cannot allow our human world - and children, who cannot possibly understand the risks and consent to them - to be put in danger out of a misplaced sense of pity for an incredibly dangerous supernatural creature.

I have Inspector Cratchett's number. If I need to, I will not hesitate to use it.
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